Bachelor life- A married man says "Cheers"!!!

“Bhai, kab nikal raha hai?”  Translated as “What time you plan to leave bro”, this was a staple question that used to get asked at 5.55 PM mon-Thursday, and at 5 PM on Fridays. The good thing about working in a corporate set up in Pune was that most companies provided transportation services. Buses leave from office at scheduled times, typically 6 PM, 7 PM and hence the questions at 5.55 PM, 5 mins before the first bus is to leave. Fridays was a different game because the way back from office was not home, but to Mumbai, my home town.

Looking back about half a decade later, life as a bachelor certainly meant fun, excitement, independence, and above all, the feeling of truly coming out of a protected way of HOMELY life. A typical day was pretty routine in nature- mornings were all about somehow making it to the bus pickup stop, just in time. Reaching that place 5 mins before time allowed the luxury of a cup of tea from the roadside tea vendor.  A 5 ft by 5 ft wooden “platform” was all that the tea vendor was, and yet, he had 50 people at 8 am, waiting to sip on his tea!! Office was routine as always and most part of the day used to pass away without a call, until 5.55 PM. It’s funny how works absorbs so much time and energy that people who stay together, almost don’t recollect each other in the day!!!

Evenings were the funner part of the day. Back in the mid 2000s, internet although all-present, wasn’t easily available on wifis. TV was never considered and smartfones weren’t known to exist as much as today. This left evenings pretty much with books, chit chatting and hangouts. Cricket took an altogether different meaning when played with other friends at someone’s home. 10 of us playing ROOM CRICKET in a 10 ft by 10 ft room meant there was enough space for- jokes, laughs, talking about girls, swearing, abusing, fighting, eating, snacking, and ofcourse, the cricket!!

Ofcourse, there were other things too: all of us fresh 24 year old fresh graduates had many things to discuss: girls, friends, GIRLfriends, stories from college, stories about others from college and the likes. Internet, more than a habit as today, was a leisurely past time, meant to be done at the internet cafes. Social networking was hitherto unknown, and as such, Orkut, google and msn were ways and means to keep in touch with friends from college.

Back to the future, life today is a much settled institution. The energies have all settled down, marriage has brought a new meaning, and the future today seems something that needs to be planned and respected. But a lot of the energies of today, a lot of the excitement, has been generated back then. Life like that is all about friends, creating permanent bonds, and ofcourse, growth- cheers to that!  

Will we ever witness that CIVIL revolution?

Amidst the dying protests and memories from the December 2012 ‘nirbhaya’ rape case comes news of another such horrendous incident- the rape of a 5 year old. Citizen India has lapped the weekend to stage another round of protests and candle vigils. Intentions not to be doubted, it is a bad coincidence that the same week also saw the death of another woman in Jaipur, due to a road accident. At that time though, no one turned up to help her husband as he begged for help on the road. Candle light vigils and protests are a far more convenient and easy method of displaying support and good intentions, helping someone on the ground is a different game altogether.

This week also saw a couple of other events, largely overshadowed by the anti-rape protests- Gold fell to a new mega low and the rupee depreciated a bit more. Both these are perceived as good signs because they tent to bring our current account deficit down big time. However, I am sure that in the times of inflation % of over 8, the common Indian man, like I am, is not too pleased with any of this.

I believe, our nation today is standing on the cusp of a potential revolution- A CIVIL one at that. We are the ones that pioneered the concept of peaceful protests to achieve big results, although the last of that happened more than 65 years ago. What are the main trigger points that lead to a revolution?
1) The situation: This is as bad as it can get. Yes there are pieces of good things as well, but the mood is more somber than happy. Rapes, corruption, inflation, women security issues, droughts, are all there. We have a platter of reasons to choose from. And I am not being humorously sarcastic about this.

2) The will: Are we there yet ? Not so much. A will does not mean simply the desire to be part of a convenient road show. Will means genuine desire and willingness to bring a change. And it starts from bringing a change whenever and wherever you can, not withstanding the impact or credit. The Jaipur accident and dozens of such everyday cases tell us we are not quite there yet

3) A leadership to channelize the will, and to strategize the plan: Did we ever have this? The problem is we all want to be leaders, not followers. And as leaders too, how much far do we really get to bring about the change?

 4) Execution: Will this happen? That’s a question I’d like to raise today to my country men.

As a country, we have all the right reasons to bring about a change, a revolution, that will wipe out the evil. But do we have the human arsenal to do that? Are we ready to make a compromise and bring about the change we all so desire? Can we finally shun the convenient complacence and act? Let me tell you something- the elections of 2014 are not going to help. Those looking at that for a miraculous magic wand solution are worse than those that did not help the jaipur man. They are not even looking at the problem, let alone solve it.

When morality fails, laws don't help

India is waking up to what is probably the oldest and the biggest termite eating us from within. Unlike external threats like terrorism, financial crisis and world dynamics, this one originates from within us, destroys us from inside, and has so far, quietly remained inside us. We also know it by the word 'RAPE'. Let's cut the story short. We all know what has happened in Delhi last month, and the outrage thereafter. And as unfortunate as it is, as I write this, and as you read this, there is a poor girl out there whose life is getting destroyed this very moment.

In all this outrage and the trial by media and citizens themselves, all of us have taken the convenient route of blaming the laws of our country. Everyone is demanding the severest possible punishment to the doers of this crime, and probably rightly so. Yes the laws are obsolete, inadequate and much ineffective.

However, in all this focus on the POST crime punishment, we are losing the main plot here- what was it that drove someone to do such a heinous act at the first place? Surely, that person didn't fear the laws, because as obsolete as they are, they still exist, and still command some fear. Surely, the person is not acting only under the influence of sexual aggression. Such kinds of rapes don't happen only by way of sexual aggression.

The biggest answer to curtailing the menace lies within- in our homes. We all have forgotten that how we become, behave, speak, what we do in later life is determined in the biggest amounts by how we have been brought up. Clearly, if a person totally forgets that by raping someone, he is destroying someone's life, he has forgotten that he was taught in his childhood that such an act was bad. How parents raise their kids, how they teach their kids about whats good and bad, is the most fundamental and long lasting teaching a child can get. It is the first book of law, the first book of knowledge, and possibly, the last that one remembers. So when we see such acts happening, we have to question ourselves. As parents and mentors, are we guiding the kids of this country correctly? Are we telling them that this is bad and should never be done? Are we taking enough care to know what he does outside as he grows? Are we missing the fundamental teachings that we are supposed to impart?

The reason to all of this is simple- when the moral fear of ruining someone's life does not deter someone, mere laws will definitely not.

FDI in retail..are we looking at the wrong problem?

I do feel concerned about our retail markets, should MNC giants enter the India market and drive consumers away from small retailers. Increasing ownership stakes and easing entry will only compound this issue. Surely, one would question the TRUE REAL need for allowing MNC giants free entry in our markets. Its not as if we have a badly shaped retail system, or that the demand market isnt organized. Both these components are sound, well established and abundant. In fact, it is this domestic system- domestic demand and supply- that were the main drivers behind India's strong survival and emergence through the 2008 sub prime recession. Questions therefore are warranted. Why would we like to disrupt this amazing ecology by bringing in foreign players, take away jobs of millions of retailers, increase inflation tendancies, and lose the tightly bound local control? 

But there are some fundamental facts also, that need to be looked at, in the way they exist in India. By nature, a walmart is not competition to the local provision store or retailer. Instead, a walmart or tesco, with their big department stores and walkins, shopping carts, bill counters, sections, and ofcourse, low prices, are more similar to the likes of Big Bazaar, Magnet, Reliance mall etc. The fundamental nature of such a business model is bulk purchase- high volumes, low prices and less frequency of buying. Consequently, I believe this is not a big major shift in the India buying and retail patterns. The likes of BigBazaar, Magnet etc already exist in good tandem with local retail, and such business models and purchasing trends are already in place. If anything, therefore, i'd think its these big retail malls that need to be more cautious and wary of MNCs than the smaller retailers should be. Plus, the nature of buying at a small retail store is more frequent, trigerred by the mandatory short value purchases either over phone, or by a quick walkin. Walmart, or tesco or magnet, this will never really change or go down with time. 

Ofcourse, this is not to mention the retail sector will not be impacted at all. In fact, it is really difficult to predict exactly how much the entry of a particular segment can impact the incumbents, unless that really happens. And, in a huge huge country like ours with such diversity and complexity, it is futile to conclude anything at this stage. FDI in retail does bring out concerns, but it also brings with it, due investments, better products, choice and health in the system. And lets not forget the incremental benefits it promises to bring in to our farmers by way of providing more buying choice/buyers for their products.

What concerns me though, for our retailers,is not the FDI, but things that happen on the ground..Cheaply imported sub-standard goods have been flooding our markets since a long time ago.. On every festive occasion, we see such goods flooding our markets and affecting business of local retailers,,,Not just here, even on an everyday basis, we need a system where our retailers at the smallest level get good values for their products...And frankly, I dont believe FDI can impact this any more negatively or positively. Lets give that a try, but lets also look at the real problems on the ground. 

Thank God- for them, and for you

Here are 4 people, I thank God for...

1) Vidya Balan: The hindi movie industry today has 2 parts to it- the first part is the semi-porn industry that features the serial kisser club. These movies, and the ensuing success represent the sheer sleaze that we crave for as audience. The other part of the industry is the ridiculous movies, the noise, the various re-makes, and absolutely every other piece of nonsense that is churned out as a movie to get the audience in. Somewhere in between the two lies Vidya Balan, the one person club. In an industry where linkups, cat fights and famous boyfriends dominate, Vidya Balan represents a wonderful change, a lovely breath of fresh air. Never one in controversy, common media hype, never one to be spotted in famous parties or camps that dominate her work universe, movie after movie after movie,Vidya reporesents the much forgotten adage- do good and move on to do more good. She remains the single sane element today in this industry

2) Yuvraj Singh: In a team that consists primarily of T20 products, Yuvraj Singh (along possibly with Zaheer Khan and Sehwag) is the last player from the Ganguly era- an era that knew cricket as a sport where winning mattered the most, when passion and aggression meant looking the stronger opponent in the eye and giving a tit for a tat. Yuvraj Singh's return, and hopefully a longer stay, from a sucessful fight against cancer (that personifies him erstwhile), is just the best thing to happen to our team right now. Apart from the sheer talent and gut that he brings along, he represents a nice classic school change to the IPL infatuated generation today- a generation that is increasingly looking at cricket as a money making career rather than as a sport they are passionate for. Everyone remembers the six that Dhoni hit over the long on off the last ball to win us the cup. But fortunately, what everyone also remembers is that Yuvraj Singh had consistently performed throughout the tourney, both with the bat and the ball. The only difference between him and the other legend of the game, Dravid, is that in donning the multiple hat, Dravid kept wickets in 2003, while Yuvraj Singh bowled in 2011. Thank God this new generation legend has survived, and pray to God he will continue to stay on the field for some more time. 

3) Amitabh Bachchan: No one took the screen so much by storm. And I am referring to the small screen, not the big screen where he was, is and will remain king. The whole thing about Amitabh Bachchan is simple- humility, modesty and connect, are the most effective and instant ways to charm the audience. In the TV sphere of today, where someone's misery is sold off as breaking news, undeserving people are rewarded with reality shows, young boys and girls spend more time waiting in a queue for an audition rather in the queue for educational admission, and where lust and sex, not love, are found instantly in TV shows, Amitabh Bachchan with his sincere earnest, happiness, humility, and the best of them all, speech, represents a mirage in the desert. To me, his offscreen person and conduct always matched his onscreen charm and acts. Thank God for this one, he has taught so many things to so many generations. 

4) Ganpati Bappa: Says Bappa "If the above 3 dont solve your problems, I will". The festival of Ganesh Chaturthi has always romanced the spirit of Mumbai. The 10 days of Ganpati are filled with colours, lights, fun, sound, and a general goodness and positivity. It just feels so good to prepare for Bappa, welcome him, to see him off till the next year, and to worship him till then. Thank God for himself!!!!

Signing off 20s...

 I am about 2.5 hrs from turning 30!!! Yes, 30!!!! i don't  know what to jot down....i only know blogs are supposed to provide a medium to express what you feel or think...20s was super,,,last year was especially amazing!! i got married!! things have settled ,,,life is on a different plane..

i am not going to write more here... just wanted to record this moment, while i am still 29!!! i only wanted to express my feeling that i am turning 30!! super...thats a different domain, senior domain,,and looks so much fun!!

cheers...good bye 20s..... 30s, here i come!!!

Rain rain, please don't go away

Dear Rain Gods,

There is little difference between the mood in my country today, and what we generally call 'filth'. As I write to you, Team Anna has shut shop for reasons known only to you. As I write to you, our olympic teams have lost another stab at a medal and some more money has been siphoned off somewhere.

Last month was a bad month, where all the negative benchmarks and levels were crossed. Assam was burning in riots and drowning in floods. The whole of North India and 30% of the population were subjected to power failure for 5 to 6 hrs on end. Life was badly disrupted, to say the least. 

Inflation is at an all time high and your absence isnt helping anything. Rupee levels are dismally low and that has made life miserable. Our farmers continue to commit suicide after after finally succumbing to the pressure of huge loans they cannot repay. Population, pollution and corruption continue to remain loyal to us

Shitty movies, tv shows and shitty people continue to mint money. There is absolutely no substance in the gazillion things that are churned out today. TV, internet and radio all have more ads, many more ads and absolutely very little substance. And of whatever is actually shown, 89.9 % is garble. 

And in all of this bad news, the one thing that could have cheered (and resolved most of these issues), is missing. Rains! Every year, after burning and sweating it out in the hot may summer, India waits for the rains with bated breath. The first time when it rains, around the 7th of june, the heat takes a backseat and the air becomes sweet. Lovely drops of water settle down on grass blades,on tress, on the windows, and on the ground. Things become so much clearer, so much better, the air becomes so quiet, cool and bearable. Birds, animals seem to suddenly become so peaceful. For once, the sound of frogs is tolerable, and brings with it,the signs of good times ahead. Office travels become much more difficult, yet so much more pleasant. A trip from Mumbai to Pune is no longer just that. It is a lovely journey that passess through the lush green hills of the khandala valley. 

And to top all of this, the lakes start smiling. Having been made to overwork, tire and slowly shrink, the lakes themselves are parched to the point of disappearance than humans are. Hitherto dry river banks start swinging and make for such pretty sight. In all of this, man is at the receiving end of all your blessings. The problems of food, water, heat are taken care of for one more year. For one time, although window seats in trains are empty because they are so wet, i love travelling by train. I know this is temporary but much needed, for the rain Gods are taking care of me.

But this year, you havent blessed us as much. The negativity in the air is not so much due to human intervention as it is due to your non-intervention. Man knows, but does not realize, that he has so much blame himself for your absence progressively every year. Yet, in his whole daily business of "going about things as usual", he does not realize how much he needs you.

How much he needs you this year, more than anytime else, India needs you dear rain God. Please come down and bless us. We need you, not so much for the water, but for all garble we have created since you last left us. We need you to come and help us clear this mental filth.