Tuesday, September 20, 2011

How Ironic

The kind of assoles we are, its ironic how we react to the same thing very differently in different situations. Check the reactions in the HOWEVER situations:

1) You are working in a company and your friend gets a job in your company, you say “Its going to be fun. I now have company over lunch.”
However, if you have moved out of your company and the same friend joins that company,, you’d say “That sonova bitch, He is going to earn much more, and grow to positions I could have, had I stayed”

2) You have resigned and are waiting to be relieved from your current company. When your company tells you to leave tomorrow instead of after a month of notice period, you go “Cool!! I will be on board my new job soon!! Awesome!!”
However, if your company fires you, and tells you to leave tomorrow, you are like “ Screw it man!! My life is fucked! How do I get a new job now!!!!”

3) You get a mid year appraisal as a result of which, your salary increases by 8%. You go gaga and say “Shitty cool!! I got a hike in the middle of the year! I love my company!!!”
However, when you don’t get the year end main appraisal because of this mid year hike, you curse them and say “Damn them!! They didn’t increase my salary this time! Time to get a new job”

Some general non-work, real life situations:

4) A player plays badly in a test match. You be a good critic and say “Even champions have their bad times.”
However, when he plays badly in a test and then follows it up with a good performance in a T20, you accuse him by saying “Assole. All he cares about is the cash rich T20 matches!!”

5) You get good marks in an exam, so does a friend. You obviously are happy “wow!! That’s nice,,phew”
However, when you fail and he scores good marks, your reaction is a tad different “Bastard!!! How the hell did he score so much!! We studied the same notes!!!!”

6) You and your neighbor, both have water running down your taps. All is well in life and you say “our area almost never has water problems. Everyone should be happy and should have water”
However, the one time you do not have water (and most probably due to a faulty pipeline), and if your neighbor continues to have water, you rant him with “Dam him!! He hasn’t paid his bills in a while and he still gets water!! Piece of shit”

7) You are playing cricket and there is this guy who is in your team. He scores a six of the last ball and wins it for your team. You appreciate him by saying “whadda playa!!! We won because of him!!”
But when he is in the opposite team and scores for the other team and wins the match for them, you go “SON OF A BITCH.”

8) You are married and then, your best friend gets married. You are ecstatic because “ its so great!! We are a couple of couples!!! (as says Chandler in friends)!!!!
However, if you are not yet married, even worse, still single, and your best friend gets married, what do you say?? “FILL IN THE BLANK”

9) Your WIFE tells you she is pregnant. You thank all Gods and say “That is so good sweetie!!! I cant even express how happy I am. I love you so much. Thanks for that!! MMuuaahh”
However, when your GIRLFRIEND tells you she is pregnant, you swear to her “Are you sure that was me?”


Rujuta said...

um...really? you say all that?

curry said...

Hehehe. Good points. Achha observation hai.